Full Speed Ahead.....

I'm jumping, I'll admit I'm leaping. Full out, arms and legs flailing off the diving board feet first first, ten feet above the water and I'm plunging in. And I'm going to come up soaking wet, we'll see if that's a good thing or a bad thing. A week ago I had no idea what I was doing the next day, well I still kind of don't but I seem to have a clearer goal now. I'm also sitting here surrounded by forms. I can't believe that I thought cosmetology school was for people who couldn't get into college. Wow, was I wrong. First of all they gave me a test. Sure it was a pretty simple test, but still it was a logics test. Plus you have to have gone to high school, you have to have references and you have to have some substantial money, which is where I'm stuck right now. I'm sitting here with my good friend the FAFSA. I didn't really plan on filling out one of those again. That was another misconception I had about cosmetology school, money. I didn't think I would have to take out a loan to go to a school like this. But of course I picked the most expensive one cause I believe it is the best one, so point being here I am. I'm not eighteen anymore and its time to do this myself. In one way I'm really happy, but there's still a part of me that can't shake the fact that most of the people I went to high school with have just graduated from four year colleges. But once again, I'm not them. One of my regrets is that I didn't figure this out four years ago, instead I had been so caught up on what everyone else was doing that I had to do the same. Which in turn turned out to be a big mistake for me. I just hope I can do this and realize this can be good for me. I just want to know that I don't have to do what other people did to still be good enough. To still be equal, that's all I really want. And I want to get out of the job I have now. Pouring wine for people that don't care is not my idea of something I want to stick with. Not at all. So I'm going to sit here and go through the forms and try and sort this mess out, stay tuned for the update.

-C